Sunday, 17 July 2016

Can you beat performance anxiety during sex? Of course, you can

You thought genitals were the most important organ that determines your performance in bed. Think again! A lot depends on what’s going inside your brain. Yes, you got it, the brain! Multiple men succumb to performance pressure which leaves them incapable of fully enjoying their sex life. In India where talking about sex is considered forbidden until boys reach a certain age, this problem is more amplified. Here are some of the causes and tips to beat performance anxiety.

  1. Don’t be cognisant of your body: Here media has a role to play as it shows people with perfectly toned body. This puts enormous pressure on people who are unable to meet such standards often leading to stress and low self-esteem. While having sex, a man may think about his body being unnaturally fat, thin or abruptly shaped. This isn’t healthy which in turn could lead to him not enjoying sex fully. The best thing to do is concentrate on body parts, hit the gym or indulge in sports. Improve fitness and everything else will be fine.
  2. The great expectation: Most teenagers are exposed to porn these days and sadly, that is the only channel through which they gain sex education. It makes them think that every man should last at least 30 minutes. However untrue, such expectations only result in loss of confidence if not met. It is crucial to understand that porn is not sex in real life and they are preformed with several cuts.
  3. Dominating thought of penis size: The more you think about it, the worse it will get. Again, this comes from unrealistic expectations by frequent porn viewing. What a man does with his penis is a lot more important than the size. Hence, it is important to stop worrying about it and start making efforts that will help you boost confidence and could be decisive in rectifying performance anxiety.
  4. The past is past, so forget about it: Unsuccessful previous encounters where a man is ridiculed while having sex may affect his confidence the next time he engages in a sexual activity. If such thing has happened to you in the past, remember to start afresh and people have become successful in fields which they initially failed. Read motivational books and get your confidence back.

However, if you are unable to solve issues by yourself, then you should see a sexologist who’ll give appropriate counselling and suggest various strategies to manage your problem.  

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